Dear Fear, I choose to stay connected and open
/This morning I noticed the fear I’ve been picking up on this week around the Corona virus was seeping across into other vulnerable areas of my life. People I’m concerned about, unresolved situations, decisions that I haven’t yet made… it had all morphed into one big tangled up jumble of fear and intensity in my system.
We have practices for fear, don't we, that we can and should be applying to help us come back to our centre over and over (as many times as we need in the coming days/weeks). Liz Gilbert's fear practice is a simple and effective one - so I’ll summarise it here in case it's helpful to you:
Acknowledge your fear when you notice you're in its grip, and thank it for working so hard to keep you safe.
Let your fear know in no uncertain terms, you've got this - you're in charge - your whole adult self is calling the shots, not your fearful reactive small self.
Tell fear it is most welcome to watch in the wings / sit in the back of the bus or the room you’re in, but it's not under any circumstances driving the bus. i.e. it is not driving your decisions. It shouldn’t be ruling your life 24/7. Otherwise ,as we know, it can run amok.
We get to monitor the level of fear we feel, especially when all that's unfolding is happening "out there".
Fear makes us contract, pull away, mistrust, become paranoid and block connection.
Fear changes how we show up, what we say to others, and it starts impacting the lens through which we see our life.
The thing is, we're wired for connection. So what I realised this morning after I saw the fear in me was taking up way too much space, was that I could choose a different response.
It's a choice for us to stay open-hearted and connected rather than shut down, contracted and fearful. I certainly am a very different person when I'm open to possibility and connection than when I'm freaking out and operating from fear.
The tension is palpable when fear has taken over - you'll notice your body is weaker, there'll be more negativity and paranoia in your conversations with others, and you just won’t feel like yourself. Your children will pick up on your energy and it will impact them too. Of course they're also dealing with their own reaction to all that's going on.
This is why unplugging from mass fear is a regular practice that's worth doing. Every time we plug into the collective to learn what's going on, every time we scroll through community feeds that are full of posts ranting and raving, every time we go to the supermarket and see empty shelves, we can easily slip back into full-blown fear (especially if you’re empathic or sensitive or worrying about someone you love being affected).
That's why fear practices and release practices right now - to release all you’re absorbing and holding, are really beneficial and important to stay connected to yourself so you can continue to show up effectively in your life.